it's okay

[Lolawashere]

it's okay if you don't think there's anything wrong with you and it's all me.
it's okay if you want to blame me for our "failed marriage"
t's okay if you tracked my cell phone bill for the last year.
it's okay if you want to think I shared intimacy with every person I had phone conversations with
it's okay if you've told all the neighbors on our street all of our business.
it's okay if you and your buddies think you have me all figured out.
it's okay if you are jealous cuz I had a relationship after I moved out.
it's okay if you think I'm a liar cuz I just wanted to protet you and not hurt you by telling you.
it's okay if you come home, stumbling drunk and call me every name in book.
it's okay if you really wish bad things for me.
it's okay if you have a distorted view of what love is.
it's okay if you want me to feel guilty.
it's okay if you want to vulgar and disgusting.


I'll try to see that you are hurting and you are looking to blame me for everything.
I'll try to see that underneath it all you have some sort of love for me,


I hope you understand one day our marriage really didn't fail, we were a great team when we were together.
I hope you understand that I never took advantage of you. I never tried to take what wasn't mine. I was always fair.
I hope you understand that I was faithful and devoted to you when we were together.
I hope you understand I didn't tell you about my relationship because I didn't want to hurt you.
I hope you understand that it was really none of your business.
I hope you see that I do love and care about you.
I hope you find the love you are looking for.
I hope you can feel better.


thank you for letting me stay here for the last month.
thank you for showing me I really have no reason to feel guilty. I needed it. I felt guilty for soo long that I didn't want to be with you. You just showed me, I have no reason to feel guilty. I didn't do anything wrong.
thank you for reminding me that we are each responsible for our own happiness.

[cigi]

it's ok for you to be more of who you truly are.
it's ok if more & more people can see that now.
it's ok for you to remind me why I am so much happier without you.
it's ok for you to refuse to support them.
it's ok for you to try to make it harder for me, 'cause that makes it easier.

it's ok that you taught me to have zero tolerance for controlling people.
it's ok that because of you, I cannot be around folks who are subversive.
it's ok that I learned thru you, that I cannot live with gratuitousness.
it's ok that I learned thru you, that I cannot stand falseness.
it's ok that I learned thru you, that being truthful is all that will ever matter to me.
it's ok that I will never be willing to act again.

it's ok for you to appear in a towel when I show up.
it's ok that I cannot find one single thing attractive about you.

it's ok that I spent those years feeling dependent on you.
it's ok that in order to be rid of you, I had to give up lots of *stuff.*
it's ok that I love my freedom.
it's ok that I haven't missed you.
it's ok that because it's over, I consider our relationship a success.

it's ok for you to talk about me.
it's ok that I find some sort of sick humor in your continued focus.
it's ok that you cannot be civil.
it's ok if I giggle when you can't hold a conversation because of your anger.

it's ok that my life continues to unfold perfectly, regardless of what happens to you.

[Mariposa]

it's ok that because it's over, I consider our relationship a success.

Cigi that's the awesomest statement ever.

Although, well of course, since I haven't been through the experiences you guys have been through, I still fucking live with my mom and get mad at her because she touches my clothes :rolleyes: I am not sure why you're saying ''it's okay'' to some things.

I have something to say you might totally not resonate with, but maybe you can consider it as a different perspective, just my opinion.

it's okay if you come home, stumbling drunk and call me every name in book.
it's okay if you really wish bad things for me.

I can understand if being ok with this brings you a feeling of peace.

But it is NOT ok that anybody disrespects you, and if it makes you completely angry and you want to fucking kick them in the balls, THAT is OKAY! You are completely entitled to be angry and I consider you could/should be okay with feeling and releasing all the anger that all of this has caused you to feel. Maybe, you guys are already passed anger, so now you're making friends with ''being ok'' with what has happened, forgiving, and that is not okay, that us great! Maybe this is MY anger talking, maybe I am just so in favor of expressing emotions and still so caught in them that I think everybody should feel angry too, lol.

Anyway, just my two cents/own venting, thank you.
:namaste:

[cigi]

But it is NOT ok that anybody disrespects you, and if it makes you completely angry and you want to fucking kick them in the balls, THAT is OKAY!



HAHAHHAHA! I love that Maris. Yeah, I'm all for kickin' a cracker in the balls.:facelol:

I think for my statements, I was saying it's totally ok for him to be a jerk, because ultimately it has no real effect on me. It doesn't matter what he thinks, says or does because my life keeps getting better & better.

I'm giving him full permission to practice douchebaggery as his religion & I accept him just as he is...after all, I learned TONS from the experience.

It's freeing. I'm free. He's free. It felt really great to write all that out.

[Lolawashere]

I think you should take that laptop. :grin:

[Lolawashere]

then what Leah? what happens after three days? where are ya going? can I come with you?

[Lolawashere]

Leah let's go to California!! I think I will leave after the 30th.

[Lolawashere]

I had to move this. : )

[Zesty]

omg trav ur the bestest!.

yeah yeah i know :)

[Daisy]

Perhaps the best music video of recent memorry - perhaps.

I sense Lolawashere's great sense of joy.

Go with the flow!:love:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dTAAsCNK7RA&a=TiZt97E5boQ&playnext_from=ML

[Lolawashere]

okay Trav! can you do me a favor ?

[Zesty]

okay Trav! can you do me a favor ? delete my post I put it somewhere else.

okay sure done

[Lolawashere]

:facelol:


and for the record, I just want to say my ex-husband is really a wonderful person. he was just working thru something that night. I really appreciate him. He helped me. He went to the emergency room with me. He let me stay at his house for a month. I wish him well. :D

[Zesty]

:facelol:


and for the record, I just want to say my ex-husband is really a wonderful person. he was just working thru something that night. I really appreciate him. He helped me. He went to the emergency room with me. He let me stay at his house for a month. I wish him well. :D

haha SOMEONE'S vibration changed, just a LIL BIT