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View Full Version : Our Oregon Experience


LadyRaine
Sat Feb 20 2010, 2:56am
Hi all. I'm not a regular here, I check in off and on.
Last fall we started really playing in earnest about where we could go and what we could do... Something very different than where we were at the time. After that, we had a whole scenario come together that resulted in us moving to Oregon and helping my friend and her boyfriend with a hotel they had bought, with various eBay and retail businesses involved. All of these things are well within our strengths and past experience, so we would be a really good addition for them. We were excited to make this move, help my friend, and get more experience for ourselves.
Now that we've been here a few months, things are not feeling like a good fit. The boyfriend is actually a control freak, micro-managing, idiotic ass. We thought we were coming in as people with experience and new ideas to help expand and refine, but he fights us on every move we make. He feels threatened by us and rejects all of our ideas- opting to only assign us menial tasks.
It's not unlike being held hostage by a retarded child. All of us hop (five adults total) when he is upset/wants something done/throws a fit. Normal productivity is impeded as soon as it starts. We can't get behind any project, our enthusiasm is way down, and we're already just showing up to get paid because doing anything more is too trying.
I am PISSED. This is NOT how it was supposed to be/not how I created it/not how it was presented to us. I didn't move all this way to be dicked around by this pea brain! I am intelligent and know SO much more than he does.
ARRRRGHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Today I got to shampoo the carpet because of puppy pooh stains. Seriously. I am a marketing whiz/eBay pro, and could be doing something that produces real dollars, but no. I shampooed carpet while I heard a 30 minute tirade about what needed to be done, then my "boss" drove 20+ miles to wash his frickin truck. Idjit.
Obviously I'm bitter. How do I reprogram/ignore what is and focus on what I want? Please share tips!

asjairok
Sat Feb 20 2010, 5:09am
Well fact is I don't know enough about you , or him...
I believe that you feel that way, and you should so something about it.
I can't even sleep if things between me and my boyfriend are not sloved. You live with a guy so, you can talk to him and see whether there is solution for two of you or not. I don't understand how it got that far, because it's different with me. I have really high self respect and low tolerance and great sensitivity, so
With me it's always all or nothing, meaning we must solve it, or there is no chance relationship to continue. I'm not gonna live in shity energy. Maybe in open, direct talk, however loud it is, you will hear his points, maybe something else will happen, but point is, it's two of you, he is most important person in your life, and you have to talk to him.
That much from me, I'd like to help you more, but I don't know enough. Hope this leads you somewhere.
:heart:
Ana.

LadyRaine
Sun Feb 21 2010, 3:09am
THANK YOU to all! Especially Sierra. That really felt like what I was hoping to hear... if that makes sense?
Ana, I may not have been clear: this is *not* my boyfriend, but my friend's. My hubby is faboo and marvelous. lol
Imagine, this is my new mantra! something new & vortexy is right around the corner.

OH- in my rant I forgot what really was the best part about this move... This place!
Coastal Oregon is quite literally heaven on earth! I've never seen anything like it, and cannot imagine leaving it!

asjairok
Sun Feb 21 2010, 4:25am
Ana, I may not have been clear: this is *not* my boyfriend, but my friend's. My hubby is faboo and marvelous. lol

Oh sorry, hehe.