GoddessNextDoor
Sun Dec 28 2008, 10:45am
Hiya friends :wave:
I am happy to report that I am officially finished with kicking my own ass for a while. I've really been putting myself through so much lately. It's been one thing after another and while I understand that all of the contrast is what creates expansion, I've been clinging to those rocks in my very fast-moving stream. I allowed things to get me into a place of feeling fearful and powerless.
While all of this was happening, I spent a lot of time listening to my Abe CD & DVD collection. I had a big "Aha" moment when I heard Abe talk about recognizing the feeling of relief. I was in a very fearful place a few days ago and did my best to find better thoughts and also did some EFT and meditation. I was hoping to start feeling happy, but all I was feeling was angry.....then I realized that I had moved myself up the EGS! I did recognize that feeling angry did feel better than feeling fearful and I remembered that by recognizing that I had done so, that LOA would kick in a help me start allowing more relief. Today I am feeling hopeful....and authentically so, no happy face stickers here.
Maybe this sounds elementary to some of you, but it was a HUGE thing for me. I finally feel like I "got" it! While I did understand on an intellectual level, how beneficial it is to gradually move oneself up the EGS, actually doing it has never been easy for me. Now I think I have a handle on it, finally!
I have been wrestling with some feelings of unworthiness lately and as a result, my experience has been a veritable smorgasboard of contrast. One thing after another. I realized that the speed at which all of it was showing up was also showing me that my stream was moving very fast and that it would be possible to start having some better things showing up quickly if I just allowed myself to chill out. I did my best to acknowledge every bit of good that came into my experience and you know what? I realized that I am worthy. I have been the recipient of so much unprecedented generosity and kindness from not only those people in my life who I count as dear friends, but from complete strangers as well. If I needed any "proof" of my worthiness, I have been been having it handed to me on a sliver platter repeatedly...I was just too caught up in the contrast to recognize it at first.
Today, I feel better. I feel hopeful and I feel worthy. Thank you for letting me share! :hug:
I am happy to report that I am officially finished with kicking my own ass for a while. I've really been putting myself through so much lately. It's been one thing after another and while I understand that all of the contrast is what creates expansion, I've been clinging to those rocks in my very fast-moving stream. I allowed things to get me into a place of feeling fearful and powerless.
While all of this was happening, I spent a lot of time listening to my Abe CD & DVD collection. I had a big "Aha" moment when I heard Abe talk about recognizing the feeling of relief. I was in a very fearful place a few days ago and did my best to find better thoughts and also did some EFT and meditation. I was hoping to start feeling happy, but all I was feeling was angry.....then I realized that I had moved myself up the EGS! I did recognize that feeling angry did feel better than feeling fearful and I remembered that by recognizing that I had done so, that LOA would kick in a help me start allowing more relief. Today I am feeling hopeful....and authentically so, no happy face stickers here.
Maybe this sounds elementary to some of you, but it was a HUGE thing for me. I finally feel like I "got" it! While I did understand on an intellectual level, how beneficial it is to gradually move oneself up the EGS, actually doing it has never been easy for me. Now I think I have a handle on it, finally!
I have been wrestling with some feelings of unworthiness lately and as a result, my experience has been a veritable smorgasboard of contrast. One thing after another. I realized that the speed at which all of it was showing up was also showing me that my stream was moving very fast and that it would be possible to start having some better things showing up quickly if I just allowed myself to chill out. I did my best to acknowledge every bit of good that came into my experience and you know what? I realized that I am worthy. I have been the recipient of so much unprecedented generosity and kindness from not only those people in my life who I count as dear friends, but from complete strangers as well. If I needed any "proof" of my worthiness, I have been been having it handed to me on a sliver platter repeatedly...I was just too caught up in the contrast to recognize it at first.
Today, I feel better. I feel hopeful and I feel worthy. Thank you for letting me share! :hug: